Recently I had the opportunity to go and see my husband in the Middle East. Lets just start with that, ok? My husband is serving our wonderful country and needed some serious family support. In short, he really missed seeing a familiar face (ME) and was facing a lot of pressure with his job, being stretched far to much and he was losing his patience. I was starting to feel him falling apart and getting down on himself. He’s always so strong and hearing him weak was beyond anything I could explain, it was a first. He called me a few weeks prior and begged me to try and come see him because he needed a break from the “ship life” and the only way to get it was if I showed up! At first I told him, “yeah, ok I’ll look into it.” But then I realized, at that moment that he would never ask me to travel half way around the world if he didn’t need me to, he’s not like that. I wasn’t going for a vacation, I was going to help him get through the remainder of our time apart and I refused to let him down. I knew that I would be taking a HUGE chance in buying that ticket, he might not even be there. But I went with my gut and a few days prior to the trip I bought the ticket. I waited until the last possible moment to buy them, trying to make sure “all my ducks were in a row,” but I still has such a feeling of uncertainty. I still can’t believe I made such a huge purchase! FYI: This isn’t the first time I’ve gone and visited my husband while he’s underway, last time I went to St. Lucia (now THAT was a wonderful vacation)!
As I kissed my kids goodbye before my 7 day trip, I welled up with tears realizing I had never been apart from them (the twins) for more than 24 hours and Zoe for more than a few days. I already missed them and I hadn’t even left yet, how could my husband do this? How could he be away for half a year or longer and not hold them or kiss them? I suddenly felt a surge of emotion and disappointment in myself for having those feelings, it’s not fair of me to do that when he can’t seem them for so long, so I wiped my tears and strolled off into the airport to check my baggage. I had one rather large piece of luggage that I was praying wouldn’t go over the 50lb mark (I tend to pack WAY too much, always). As I typed in my passport information I started to get pretty excited, nervous and anxious even though I had a good 18 hours of travel ahead of me! The scale read my bag at 49.8lbs, yeah *sigh* no charge for me! I said goodbye to my belongings and prayed that they would meet me in my destination soon! Pray for my luggage? Why, yes! I always do that, I’m so flippin’ paranoid that my bags are going to get lost and I’ll be stranded without a second pair of…shoes (what did you think I was going to say here? Underwear of something, yeah…that too). The next 18 hours were to say the least, uneventful, full of flights, turbulence, movies, bad airplane food, crying babies, coughing men and annoying people including the woman that refused to shut off her stupid light in my row so that I could sleep, rude! I tried to shut it off for her when she would fall asleep, but she would instantly wake up and turn that sucker right back on, idiot! Oh well, I snoozed a bit, but was too excited at this point to even think about sleeping!
I arrived in my final destination to discover that my beloved husband was NOWHERE to be found! Yeah, he left me stranded in an airport in the middle east! Note: It wasn’t his fault, he couldn’t get out of work in time to come get me, another reason I seriously dislike this command he works for. They have ZERO respect for others plans, feelings or needs. Anyways, Greg and I had made plans prior to my trip that he if wasn’t there by 430, I should take a taxi to the hotel and he would meet me there. Luckily for me, my hotel had a free shuttle to and from the airport, phew, problem solved. I waited about 10 minutes and then I was off to the hotel.
First thing I noticed when I walked out of the airport is how hot it was, yuck! The second thing I became aware of almost immediately was the local driving habits. The cars are crammed onto these tiny roads and they come within an inch of each other. No one gets mad (or at least I never experienced it) when they are driving. When a car needs to cut in front of another, which is every single second, they just honk and go. No one lays on the horn, yells or gives the bird. I was so surprised! I got to the hotel, they knew who I was right away and checked me in and away I went to my room. I got to the room and was blown away by the size of it! I thought for sure I would be in a tiny little room with nothing in it. I was SO wrong! I started to unpack and was getting frustrated that I knew I couldn’t get ahold of Greg. I didn’t have a number for him, no phone, no internet, nada! Then, a knock on the door, alas, could it be? Yes, it was my handsome hubby standing right outside the door! I practically knocked him over when he came in the room. I had missed his face so very much! I know our separation at the time was still in the beginning stages, but he left me in Florida weeks prior to his scheduled underway, so it was longer for me than other wives still stationed in Hawaii.
We sat and talked for a while and then headed out for dinner. We ended up staying out until 2am and then sleeping until 330pm in the afternoon! I don’t think I’ve ever in.my.life. slept until 330 in the afternoon! But, you have to realize, I was extremely jet-lagged! I left Florida on a Wednesday at 1 and arrived in my location Thursday at 340 in the afternoon, so I was more than tired! We had a lot of great talks those five days, about everything under the sun. It was just so wonderful to be with him again. I hate being apart from my best friend, it’s like a piece of me is always missing and I hate that. We walked around, took many taxis and visited the US base that was around the corner from the hotel. We attempted to avoid everyone from his ship so that he could concentrate on getting some air and forgetting them for a little bit. We did run into some eventually, but it wasn’t bad. If I hadn’t gone to see him, he would have gotten maybe a night out but would have had to stay with people he works with. Since I went, he was able to get away and not see them at all, I consider that a small success! We ate at many different restaurants, shopped at the gold malls and one of the largest malls in the area, and saw a beautiful Mosque. Seeing the culture and all the architecture was the most rewarding to me, it was a trip of a lifetime and something I will always remember.
We had a wonderful time together and I wouldn’t trade it for the world, I am truly blessed that I was able to go and see him and thankful for all of those who made it possible! As I was saying goodbye to him at the airport on my way back to the kids, I couldn’t help but feel horrible that I was getting to do that, it’s just not fair. I wished I could have packed him in my bag, bought him a ticket or taken him with me. To see the hurt in his eyes as I walked away and know that he was trying his best to stay brave for me as I crumbled inside was just heart breaking. Having to say goodbye for a second time was almost as bad as the first. I cried a lot over the next 17 hours of travel back to Florida. I kept thinking how long it would be until I could hold him again, kiss him again or just sit with him and do nothing again. It’s a feeling that unless your a military spouse, it’s very hard to explain.
The entire purpose of my trip to the middle east and to see my husband was to relieve some of his stress, give him a break and be there for him to vent. I did all of those things and I know it’s helped him in the weeks following the trip. He doesn’t have it easy with his job and it seems like things are always coming down on him specifically, but I keep reminding him..”This to shall pass.” I know it’s often easier said than done, but the point is to keep the positivity up and running. I do what I can here on the “home front.” I send tons of care packages and have had many friends and family ask to help support him and his fellow shipmates! I’ve also managed to get a few major companies (Wriggles, Tijuana Flats and Hershey’s) to help send care packages out his way! Oh, and lets not forget some of the veterans groups and volunteers that will be sending packages to him as well! I am so blessed, I can’t say that enough!
XOXO
